And I Have Touched the Sky
by Lasha Lee

"That's right after we bought the house." Duo pointed at a photograph of himself with his arm around a smiling, very pregnant Hilde. "I told her we'd have to enlarge the doors soon to get her in and out."

"And her reaction?" Heero asked dryly.

"She hit me."

"Good! You deserve to be hit for a comment like that." He looked over Duo's shoulder at the next page. "Now that is just adorable."

In the picture, Duo, looking like death warmed over, was fast asleep on a couch, circles under his eyes and hair everywhere. On his chest was a red, wrinkled newborn, sleeping in complete contentment. One of Duo's arms was around the baby protectively. Underneath the picture was the caption, in red ink. "My sleepy angels."

Duo and Heero were cuddled together on the sofa in Duo's room, Duo reclining in Heero's arms. He flipped the page to a picture of Jazz toddling toward Hilde, arms widespread and obviously laughing. "That was right before she died. They were really tight. He'd just started calling her Ma."

Heero looked at the other photographers, bits and pieces of Duo's life preserved on paper. "You guys were really happy together. Duo, I'm so sorry you had to lose it."

"So was I. But I couldn't just give up. Jazz needed me."

"You were only 19 when he was born though. That's young to be a dad, let alone a single one." Heero pressed. "I'm really proud of you."

"Hey, I'm a born survivor, what I can I say?" Duo glanced up at Heero. "But let me tell you, bringing down a score of Leos is NOTHING compared to trying to wash chocolate oatmeal out of a two year old's hair when he dumps it on his head for some reason."

They were quiet for a while, just enjoying the closeness. Heero ran his hand over Duo's back, caressing it through the black silk pajamas, which Duo had maintained were a gift from Quatre. Duo purred and cuddled closer, and felt Heero tilt up his chin.

Then, for the first time, Heero's mouth covered his and he was unable to swallow his moan. God, he tasted good. Like something raw and wild, like... vegetables ripped right from the ground and eaten on the spot. He tasted the way lightning would taste if you could take a bite of it.

Heero's hands snaked over his back, lower, rubbing and warming the silk over his rear, pulling him closer against the Japanese man's body until Heero's desire was pressed sharply against Duo's. Heero's mouth was locked against Duo's neck, and moved lower to his collar bone, and his hands began undoing the buttons on Duo's top.

"Wait, Heero stop." Duo broke away. "Before this goes any further I need to tell you some things. Please."

Heero pulled back and sat up, taking in gulps of air. "You can tell me anything." He prompted.

Duo took a shuddering breath. "Heero, when I was a kid, out on the streets, stuff happened. I was little, I was weak, and if some sicko decided he wanted me... there was nothing I could do about it. It was easier after a while just to give in and let them take what they wanted."

Heero gasped softly. He had suspected as much but had never broached the subject. Duo continued.

"But each time I had to lay there and take it, I made a promise to myself. That one day I'd be strong, and I'd have a choice. And when I did have a choice, it was going to have meaning. If I was with someone, willingly, then it was because I was going to be with them for the rest of my life. Over and over I repeated that to myself, like a mantra, to try and distract myself from what was happening, from the pain. And I've kept that promise. The only person I've ever been with of my own free will was my wife. I've dated since Hilde died, but I've never gone beyond that. I've never wanted to.

"I want to now. You don't know how much I want to, but you need to know what you're getting into here." He stopped for a second. "Heero, I love you. Always have, always will. I've loved you ever since we were just kids in way over our heads. If we do this, you will never be rid of me. You'll be helping me find my dentures before we go to sleep at night."


"Let me finish. Please. Then there's Jazz. There's more to being a parent than fun and games. You'd have to help him with his homework, and take away his pocky, and send him to his room, and a whole bunch of other stuff he won't like very much. I know how much that is to ask. So if you want out, I won't be offended. But you have a right to know what the whole package is here."

"Are you finished?"

Duo nodded, flushing as Heero stroked his cheek.

"I've never been with anyone, of my own free will or not. I've never wanted anyone else except for you. I love you, and I love your son, and if you give me a chance, I'll be there for both of you until we're so old and gray and wrinkled we barely remember our own names. You're offering me forever. Mission completely..." he kissed Duo's forehead. "totally", his right cheek. "accepted." his lips found Duo's again.

Duo whimpered, feeling Heero's hand on his thigh. "Make love to me, then. We've waited long enough." he whispered.

"Are you sure?" Heero fingered the buttons. "You can tell me to stop at any time and I will."

"I'm sure." Duo nodded. "You... umm, know how, right?"

"Yes, I've read about how it's done." Heero slipped open one button. "I've also read some interesting variations we'll have to try out sooner or later. For tonight, I just want to touch you." His hand slid inward and caressed Duo's erection through the silk cloth. Duo rubbed against him, gasping for air, pulling Heero's shirt above his head and tossing it on the floor.

"Do you want to move to the bed?"

"No, here." Duo whispered. "Right here."

Heero removed his shirt, and ran his hands down Duo's bare chest, pressing his palms against the other man's nipples and dragging them lower. His fingers hooked the waistband of Duo's pajama bottoms and tugged them off, leaving them near his own discarded shirt. He had no memory of removing his pants, but in another second they were on the floor as well.

For a minute, they simply looked at each other, drinking in the sight. Heero reached back and pulled Duo's loose hair around his shoulders."You look like original sin." the Japanese man breathed. "Mankind's downfall because I don't know anyone couldn't see you and want what you have to offer. But I will ask again. Do you want this? Do you want me?"

"More than anything." Duo managed to find his voice. "Please..."

Heero pushed him back down on the couch, his weight fully on Duo, but the American didn't mind. It was an incredible sensation of belonging to another person entirely. He saw Heero's hand move out of the corner of his eye and pick up a jar from the table.

"You want to use that?" Duo raised an eyebrow. "Hey, works for me."

"What is it?" Heero was busy moving his mouth down Duo's stomach and was not looking at the jar.

"Analgesic gel. It's... got... menthol... it'll make your skin cold... then hot again... oh god..."

His head snapped backward as warmth encircled him, a suction so deep he felt his very soul was being removed through his groin a piece at a time and he gladly surrendered it.

He fragmented then, shattering into Duo dust on the leather sofa, and laid there motionless, boneless, and thoughtless, until the dust formed into a living being once more.

He looked up into the electric blue eyes near his own. "Oh god." he whispered again. He turned over on the couch, pressing his cheek against the leather, as well as his returning erection. "Hurry."

He heard he lid unscrew from the jar and the sharp scent of menthol filled the air. Then one super-cooled finger made it's way down the crevasse of his rear and slipped between the globes to rub against his opening. Slowing it worked it's way into him, the menthol providing an almost impossible combination of hot and cold. After a minute, another cool finger joined the first, and then a third, moving back and forth, until Duo was almost crying in his need.

Heero lifted his hips, positioning him. His chest covered Duo's back and his hands covered the backs of the American's hands. His mouth was near Duo's ear, his hot breath tickling the tiny hairs there. Then Duo felt himself parted again as Heero's slick, menthol-enhanced length filled him.

"You belong to me now." Heero whispered in Duo's ear. "For the rest of your life you are mine. Tell me." He slid back and thrust in again.

"I am yours." Duo gasped, pushing back against Heero's thrust. "For... ever... " One of Heero's hands moved around Duo to stroke his erection, and Duo nearly wailed as the menthol gel was rubbed into his sensitive flesh.

Duo wasn't sure what was more erotic; the hand stroking him, the hardness thrusting into him, or Heero's words in his ear. Words of love, of desire and need. Of possession too. To each whispered question Duo agreed completely.

Heero moved faster, his hand moving in a counter-rythym now with his thrusts. "I'm about to come." he panted in Duo's ear. "You want that, don't you? You want me to come inside of you, to fill you."

"Yes, I want that." Duo choked out. "Do it." His own release happened then, spraying out in gusts against Heero's hand and the couch.

"I'm coming." Heero gasped. "Oh god, I'm cominnnnggg.." His body stiffened above Duo and he shuddered, releasing his seed into the other man's body endlessly, binding them together body and soul. He cried out, a wordless, animal noise, and collapsed against Duo's back, still inside of his lover.

Duo turned his head so he could breath, but as before he enjoyed the weight pushing him down, as well as the warm pulses now racing through his body.

Heero finally spoke up after a minute. "Do you want to go to the bed now?"

Duo nodded, and Heero picked him up effortlessly and carried him over to the bed, sliding both of them under the thick blanket. He positioned Duo to lay half on top of him and Duo hugged his waist, his forehead against Heero's neck. "Even if I can't remember my own name, I'll never forget what it was like to make love with you for the first time." Duo said in the stillness.

"I'll be there reminding you every day." Heero promised, pulling Duo tighter against him. "Sleep now." His thumb pushed Duo's eyelids closed. "Sleep and dream. I'll be here to guard you. I love you."

Duo drifted off into a deep, peaceful sleep, those last words resonating in his heart.

On to part six. Back to part four.