Two Divided By Zero
by Lasha Lee

Heero walked into his bedroom, rubbing the water from his hair with a fluffy blue towel. He smiled to see Duo already in the bed, his hands tucked behind his head, watching him.

"Duo, look. I'm sorry about Gage. I know I should have asked you before..."

Duo waved him off. "Don't worry about. He's starting to grow on me, actually. Those poor nuns..."

Heero glared at him. "Hey, YOU never had to live with Holy Sisters." Duo reminded him.

"True." Heero laid down on the bed, and tossed the towel aside. He leaned over and kissed Duo quickly on the lips. "As much as I hate to say it, I've got to agree with Denea. I love Relena to death, but she's put her career ahead of making sure her son grows up right. And Gage knows it. And he resents it deeply."

Duo reached out, running his fingernails lightly up and down Heero's damp arm. "You know what I need?"

Heero smirked.

"Besides that." Duo laughed. "I want to have a party."

"Oh?" Heero snuggled closer. "Any special occasion in mind?"

"I can think of one coming up next month."

"Whatever could that be?"

Duo was now teasing one of Heero's nipples with his thumb. "Maybe the 20th anniversary of our Pledge?"

"Well, there is that."

"Uh huh." Duo bent forward, flicking at the brown flesh with his tongue and Heero groaned. "I think we should have a big party, and invite everyone, and get really drunk, and I can sing you sappy songs, and we can dance all night."

"All night?"

"Part of the night." Duo amended. "So you wanna?"

"Hell yes."

"I mean the party."

"Sure. Whatever you want." Duo's hand was now wrapped around his penis, stroking slowly up and down. "Keep doing that, and I'll agree to anything."

There was a huge difference, Heero thought, between ritual and routine. Routine couldn't help but become stale after a while. Rituals, on the other hand, never got old.

After nearly twenty years together, there was nothing about each other's bodies that they didn't know. When they had been younger, sex had been frantic, fast, and furious. None the less good for it, but different.

They took it slower now, savored it, relished it. There was no reason to rush; climax would happen but it was now a nice side-effect and not the reason behind the act. Far better were the touches, the teases, the whispers.

Duo had known a man who restored and sold pianos. He watched the old timer loving refinish and restring them, and saw them go home with new owners. The old man, however, only had one of his own. It was battered, and the keys chipped and yellowed.

"Why don't you get rid of it?" Duo had asked, puzzled. "Keep one of the nicer ones?"

The old man had only laughed. "Son, this piano has been in my family for 100 years. It's been mine for almost sixty-five. And it's the only one I want. These keys are grooved, you see. They fit my fingers perfectly. I've practiced on the other ones, but this is the only one I can honestly say I've ever made music with. We've grown old together, and we know each other. There's more to be said for that than you can understand at your age. But someday, you will."

He was right. Duo did understand now. His fingers could move blindly in the dark, finding every sensitive place on and in Heero's body. He knew how to play any song on his maclen that he wanted to, from a frantic "Flight of the Bumblebee" to a slow, solemn "Moonlight Sonata."

Heero was playing him tonight, a gentle rhythm of touches and kisses and murmurs, sharps and flats, long and short pauses. The scale in all octaves. It was a song without name, and it was Duo's favorite melody.

They twisted on the bed, seeking to reach more distant notes, and Duo thought hazily that they were now playing "In the Hall of the Mountain King." A slow build up to a wild explosion. Probably the most sexual song ever composed.

Heero's fingers were slick now as he breached his lover with them, causing Duo to whimper. He stared down at Duo as he prepared him, humbled by the fact that after all this time, this incredible, ageless creature still wanted him. Still needed him.

He leaned forward, pushing against the small opening, feeling it give and welcome him inside, feeling Duo's fingers griping his biceps tightly. He moved until his forehead was resting against Duo's, and they were staring into each other's eyes, before he began to thrust.

It was slow and steady, each movement and counter-movement lasting a lifetime. Duo had his legs wrapped tightly around Heero's back, playing his part of their harmony with practiced perfection. He released Heero's arms with one hand and reached around, moving his fingertips along Heero's sensitive opening as his love penetrated him.

The finale was rapidly approaching, and they picked up the pace a bit. Not much; but now because they had a burning need to watch either other climax rather than achieve their own. Duo was dimly aware that Heero was stroking his erection, and had been for some time, and he felt his time nearing.

It was the ritual. He had to go first, because Heero would not finish with him unsatisfied. He allowed himself to become lost in the sensations. The tug and push of the hardness inside of him, the slick hand rubbing him, the sweat pooling into his navel, and the blue eyes inches from his own.

He came with a cry that was music to Heero's ears, and Heero met the tune with his own, caught it, carried it with him as he spiraled into his own ending, coming so hard it almost hurt, and falling heavily into Duo's arms.

Now, the song consisted of their heartbeats, their breathing, the sound of their skin sticking together and separating.

As the sweat cooled on his flesh, Duo found his voice. "Brave, Maestro. Standing ovation."

Heero nuzzled into his neck. "You think that was good, just wait till you see what I've got planned for the encore."


"You know, not to be rude, Miss Chang, but my parents do make sure that I have suitable garments to wear. The fact that I chose to present myself in my natural state at the football game had nothing to do with the fact that I lacked clothing. And I did make sure I brought some with me." Gage stood in Shan's bedroom, his hands on his hips. He was dressed in a pair of Shan's black jeans, which fit snugly. His chest was bare.

"Yes, but it's more fun this way." Meishel waved off his protest. "Everyone dresses kind of weird to go Minos. It's tradition."

"I see." Gage nodded. "As I mentioned before, I do still have that football helmet."

Shan coughed into his hand. "Well... that would certainly get some attention." the boy muttered.

Here he was, in a state of half-dress, positively oozing sex appeal, and Chang Shan didn't even appear in the slightest interested, Gage sighed to himself. He had hoped that, being raised around Duo and Heero, Shan might have decided to already sign up for a tour of duty on the Good Ship Lollipop, so to speak. Obviously, that had not happened yet. Oh well, he was up to a challenge.

Shan began studying him, and Gage felt a flicker of hope. He gave the other boy his most charming smile.

"Jazz's shirt." Shan said suddenly.

"Dear boy." Gage leaned forward. "You might want to have your prescription for your eyewear rechecked. I'm not wearing any shirt right now, let alone one I've pilfered from the younger Mr. Maxwell."

"No." Shan sighed. "I thought of something you can wear to Minos. Jazz gave it to me." He went to his closet and did a quick search. "Here." He pulled out a blue garment, and handed it to Gage.

The boy fingered the soft material. "It's lovely." he said honestly.

"It's a Tren shirt." Meishel added. "A Tren is here... like what your mother is on Earth. And most of them wear shirts like that. It's a little big on Shan, but I think he's right; you'd look good in it. And since your mother is like a Tren, it's appropriate."

Gage slipped it over his shoulders, and noticed that it wrapped around his waist, fastening at the side.

"Wow." Meishel said a second later. "It sure looks better on you than it ever did on Shan. Here." She led Gage to a mirror.

He looked in surprise at his own reflection. The clothing did look good on him. It made him look... regal. He tilted his head. His mother had been a queen once upon a time, after all. He had been born a prince if not really recognized as one. Yes, it was very fitting.

"Well, now that Gage is taken care of, I'm going to go change myself. Be back in five." Meishel hurried out of the room.

Shan was wearing a black mesh shirt and red jeans. But it wasn't the clothing that made him look good, Gage decided. It was the air he had about him. Intelligence. Innocence. It was invigorating. He realized too that it was the first time they had been alone together since his return to Dera.

"Shan..." Gage said suddenly.

"Hum?"

"Your name. Does it mean anything?"

"Yeah. Mountain. A bad joke of my father's before 'Shel and I were born."

"I see." Gage rubbed his chin. "I looked mine up a few years ago. Do you know what Gage means?"

"No." Shan was confused.

"It means pledge. A gage was a glove given to someone as a sign of both goodwill, and a promise that a promise would be kept."

"Weird." Shan laughed. "But it suits you."

"A friend of mine once told me that gas gage was more appropriate. That I was always running on empty." Gage turned back to the mirror and ran a hand through his hair.

"Are you?" Shan asked suddenly. He joined Gage at the mirror and picked up a brush, giving his own black hair a few quick strokes.

"That depends on the situation." Gage twisted his bottom lip. "I personally always thought my parents opened The Big Book of Out-Dated Baby Names and threw a dart. I suppose it's only sheer luck that I didn't end up being called Nancy."

"Yeah, well, remember when I told you about how my last name is first? I've had to explain that to people my entire life. If my father didn't work at the school, there'd be people who'd still insist that my first name was Chang.

"Your father works at your school?"

"He's a history teacher there." Shan groaned. "And that's a nightmare, believe me. If someone else screws up on test, they get a bad grade and that's the end of it. If WE get a bad grade, we have to hear about it at dinner, for the next three days, about how we're shaming our ancestors."

Gage felt he should say something sympathetic at this point; make an appropriate comment about his own family, but he found he could not.

He couldn't recall the last time he'd eaten dinner with his parents, for one thing. Cook either fixed him up a plate, or he made his own dinner, and ate up in his room. He found the company more stimulating, and had no desire to hear his parents yammering about trade problems in Tibet, or how one of the Colonies was suddenly charging an outrageous price for spinach.

And they didn't yell at him about bad grades because he never got any. School was a joke for him; something to be tolerated and discarded as soon as possible. He was at the top of his class academically, although his behavior kept him well out of the running for any recognition to go with it.

His reasons for applying himself in school were simple; he wanted to be able to support himself and move out of his parents' house as soon as possible. He didn't care if he was poor and starving; far better that than to be dependent on them for anything.

"What do you want to do when you graduate?" Shan asked to fill the sudden silence.

"I haven't decided yet. I'm torn between comic-book villain, plunger, and a tree in the park. I haven't ruled out homemaker and mother of eight, either."

"Gage, I'm serious." Shan gave him an exasperated look.

"So am I. I really don't know. So long as it's has nothing to do with politics." He said firmly. "If my mother thinks I have even the slightest desire to be Vice-Foreign Minister Drummond, then she can kiss..."

"I'm back." Meishel reentered the room. "Sorry it took so long."

It really was a shame that she wasn't his type, Gage thought with a sigh. Because she was too cute for words. She had her hair braided, like Duo's, only with a pink silk ribbon wound through it, contrasting with her black ponytail. She was also wearing pink jeans and a pink half-shirt that exposed her navel. Her eyelids were painted hot pink, and was her bellybutton. He liked her, Gage decided. He wasn't attracted to her, but Chang Meishel had both brains and class. And she was fun.

"Very nice, Miss Chang." He nodded in approval. "You are a true vision of loveliness. Shall we depart?" He held out his arm, cocking it.

"Why thank you, Mr. Drummond." Meishel locked her arm with his. "Let's do. Come on Shan."

Shan followed his sister and Gage down the stairs and toward the living room, chuckling. He wasn't sure how the night was going to end up, but with Gage along, it was bound to be interesting.


The teleporter let them out near Minos, and the twins immediately led Gage down the sidewalk to where a line had formed. It was after dark here, and the stars were out, but not in any form her recognized. They passed several buildings already closed up for the night.

Maybe it was the lack of cars that made it feel different. He felt a flash of something that surprised him. Not fear exactly, but more of a through-the-looking glass feeling. As Jazz had said, he really wasn't in Kansas any longer. Earth, and all that he was familiar with, was far away. He had a sudden, insane desire to see Officer Mitchell step out of the shadows.

The twins stepped into line, with Gage behind them. Craning his neck, he could see guards at the door carefully plucking hairs and testing them. Most people were issued inside after that, but a few were turned away with harsh words.

"I thought this was a kids club." Gage said to Meishel. "Why are they scanning people?"

"To make sure no one OVER age sneaks in." Shan explained. "People try all the time. Mostly it's people who just turned 18. They have a hard time accepting that they aren't kids any more and they get nostalgic."

"Some of them." Meishel added. "Are just pervies. They think they'll go in, slip a kid something stronger than fruit juice, and get lucky."

Gage was eyeing the rejects with interest now. However, none of them looked very appealing. He was disappointed. It might take him quite a while to break down the young Mr. Chang. Having something to tide him over in the meantime could have been useful.

"Hey, Meishel's here." Someone called from up ahead in the line. "We're safe from the jerks tonight." Everyone else laughed, including the twins.

"Sometimes, those losers don't take no for an answer." Shan explained. "They'll come up to kids standing in line or trying to leave and make a play.

"A few weeks ago, this big guy left one of the adult clubs, saw the line at this one, and decided that he was going try something."

"He picked Seera." Meishel continued as they moved up in line. "She's even smaller than me; she's only 13. And her parents keep her wrapped in cotton, so she's really innocent."

"This pig just walked right up to the line, picked Seera up, and started carrying her off. Unluckily for him, Meishel happened to see it. Seera was hysterical."

"I ran up and demanded that he put her down. He laughed in my face. He reached out and tried to grab me too. So I didn't have a choice; I beat the snot out of him."

"The cops showed up and took some statements. Meishel got her picture on the news." Shan said proudly. "My father almost starts crying whenever anyone mentions it; it was the happiest day of his life."

"I'm small but deadly." Meishel laughed again. "And I hate bullies." They were near the door now.

"Hey there, sweetheart." One of the rejects yelled over at Gage. "Wanna go somewhere a lot more fun?"

"Absolutely, my good man." Gage called back. "But not with you." The kids around them burst out laughing.

"Nice one." Meishel cheered.

"I'll show you a good time." The man persisted.

"And a smashing good time I'm sure it would be." Gage replied. "But I'll have to decline. I'm allergic to pedophiles, you see. And me sneezing all over you would put something of a damper on the mood, don't you think?"

They had reached the front door. Gage moved ahead of the twins. "Hello sir." he greeted the guard. "Are you one of the ones responsible for making sure riffraff like those yonder do not infiltrate your fine establishment and cause undo distress to myself and my likewise innocent and impressionable peers?"

"Huh?" The guard ask, scratching his head.

"He wants to know if you'll make sure the scum bags stay out." Shan translated. "Don't mind him. He's not from around here."

"Yeah sure." The guard still looked puzzled. "No one gets past me." He reached out and yanked a hair from Gage's head and put it under the scanner. "Clear. Go on in."

Gage waited in the entrance for the guard to finish scanning Meishel and Shan and pronounce them clear for entering.

"He sees us all the time." Meishel chuckled. "It boggles my mind how he thinks we could scan as 15 one day and suddenly turn 18 a few days later, but I guess it's just his job. Jael's not bright enough to do much else, but he's good at making sure the club is safe."

"You're doing a wonderful job, Jael." Gage called outside to the guard, and gave him a double thumbs up. "I can relax and enjoy myself knowing that you're on the watch."

Jael gave him a sincere wave and went back to plucking hairs.

The twins looked at each other, and Gage had a sudden feeling that they were speaking, although neither said a word. Without warning they each took one of his hands and pulled him into the interior of the club.


Teenagers were everywhere, sitting at the metal tables and in booths. An empty stage took up one end, with a crowded dance floor in front of it.

Several of the kids called out to Shan and Meishel, and worked their way over to them.

The twins spotted an empty booth and pulled Gage toward it. Shan and Meishel slide in first, sitting across from each other, and after thinking a moment, Gage slide in next to Meishel, where he could see Shan.

Shan flagged down a waitress and ordered three of something called Setan Sunsets. "It's non-alcoholic, but it's full of sugar. It'll give you a real kick." Shan explained.

"Well, then, I look forward to being kicked."

The Setan Sunsets weren't bad, Gage thought a moment later, sipping his. Not up to the real stuff, of course, but much better than the watery cola one usually found in these kind of places.

"Don't be surprised if you become the event of the evening." Meishel warned. "Heero wrote this book, you see. When he first came here. Everyone knows about your mom and uncle; the book is required reading in school now to teach kids about Earth and the Colonies."

"Oh dear... " Gage said dryly.

"The general consensus on your mother falls along two lines; there are those who feel sorry for her and think that she should have ended up with Heero. And then there are people who think that she was an obsessed crackpot and that Heero should have shot her dead when he had the chance."

Gage took a minute to wipe his face; he had laughed Setan Sunset out of his nose.

"You'll be happy to know that your uncle is generally more popular. The part about him rebuilding Heero's Gundam for him? That just gets to everyone. They think he's incredibly honorable. Of course, there are those who think he was also an obsessed crackpot, but hey, you can't please everyone." Meishel shrugged. "People think that about Baba too. I haven't the heart to ever tell him that Shan and I agree."

"Someone did." Shan remembered. "They wrote a beautiful essay about how all of the Gundam pilots and the people they associated with were raving lunatics and should have never been allowed on Dera. Especially Baba. "

"I'm surprised your father didn't kill them." Gage replied.

"I'm sure he wanted to. But he couldn't."

"Well, no, I don't suppose he could kill a student." The blond boy admitted.

"Especially not when that student was his godson. Duo would have been incredibly miffed if he'd done Jazz in." Shan shrugged. "Not to mention that we'd have never spoken to him again."

"You know, I am liking Jazz more and more all the time."

"See, you have to understand." Meishel finished her drink. "Jazz is... well, you know how you feel about your uncle? That's how we feel about Jazz. We've known him since we were born. He's awesome."

Shan put down his glass. "We better go introduce Gage. The natives are getting restless." He pointed a knot of teens standing a little bit apart, staring at them.

"Why don't they just come up to the table?"

"Because this is Meishel's don't-bother-me booth. She wanted a minute to get you ready for what you're probably going to have to face."

Meishel grinned at her brother, and once again Gage got the impression that they were speaking on another level. She raised an eyebrow at Shan in a question, and he shrugged. "Sorry. Left them at home."

"Huh?" Gage asked.

"Your blindfold and cigar."

"How the... "

"We're twins."

"Hold up." Gage protested. "I've read about that stuff. It only happens with IDENTICAL twins, not fraternal."

"We're half-identical." Shan explained.

"Okay... "

"It's really rare." Meishel added. "We didn't even know until they did some tests on us last year."

"I'm not sure what half-identical is."

"Well, with fraternal twins, you get two eggs and two sperm. With half-identical twins, the egg splits before it's fertilized. And then each half gets it's own fishy. So they can be different genders. Like us." She pointed at herself and Shan.

"Seriously?"

"Well, no, not really." Shan quipped and the twins burst into laughter at Gage's expression.

"Very funny." Gage laughed himself. They'd gotten him.

"We're fraternal twins. There is such a thing as half-identical; we looked it up. And it happens just the way we described. But we're not. We're just really good at reading each other."

The twins stood up, and Meishel nudged Gage out of the booth. "Come on. We'll make sure they take it easy on you."


Author's note: Half-Identical twins are rare, but do exist and can either the same or opposite genders. Perhaps the best known half-identical twins are Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen. That's why they look exactly alike, but are not identical twins. In some rare cases, half-identicals can even be Siamese twins. I went to school with a brother and sister who were born with the boy's toe attached to the girl's ear (She still scars from where they were separated.) Until more information was known about half-identicals, how fraternal twins could be born attached baffled everyone.

On to part seven. Back to part five.